Journey to Self Care

From the years 2006-2016, my life was very busy. We were on the go ALL the time. We owed that crazy type of busy to club soccer. Both kids were playing on select teams and had practice on opposite nights, so family dinners were scarce. The weekends were even crazier.

I remember times when I had to go to the grocery store at night. Late at night. It wasn’t crowded at 11:00 pm, but the overnight stockers were in the way on most aisles. Nothing about shopping that late was convenient, but I had to get food and necessities for my family.

On any given Saturday, we would be gone for 8 hours for two soccer games. When the kids entered high school, it got worse. They then had choir and school soccer on top of club soccer.

In addition to what the offspring had going on, I had just as much. Both my husband and I worked full-time. I helped many of the coaches by being the team manager. That meant I helped with communication, hotel accommodations for tournaments, registration for the new season, paperwork, fundraisers, and other things. I was also active in their school with PTA, project graduation, t-shirt sales, and just about anything I was asked.

I loved every minute of being involved. I gave my time to help my children and the programs they were in. However, there were times I felt like nothing more than a free of charge uber driver.

In August of 2018, my youngest left for college. My husband and I became empty-nesters. I missed my kiddos tremendously. My heart seemed to actually ache at times. I was also bored. After work and dinner, there wasn’t anything pressing that had to be done. It was weird.

Slowly, I began to realize how much more rested I felt. I also felt more at peace. I used my extra time for bible studies, reading, blogging, mani-pedis, drinks with friends, and movie dates with my husband. I felt relaxed.

As time when on, I began to see those cool Facebook ‘memories to look back on’. I noticed a trend in many of my old posts. I was looking for a break, a rainy day that would cancel soccer. I didn’t realize it at the time because I was just so swept up in the business of our lives, but I needed some time for myself. I needed some time for just my husband. I needed time for friends. I needed time for God.

I can only speculate that it would have made a difference back then, but I think it would have. Perhaps I wouldn’t have felt that I spread myself so thin that I was going to break. Maybe I would have had more patience when things didn’t go as planned.

Every season in our lives is just that, a season. It will pass and change. You move from one extreme to another. Take care of yourself in the process. Take a bubble bath. Spend time reading the bible. Go to lunch or dinner with a friend. Get a massage. Walk around the block. Meditate. Log off social media for a few hours. Pray. Reminisce with family or friends. Plan a date night with your spouse. Read a book. Take a cooking class. Try a new recipe. Go to the shooting range. Go camping. Sit in silence. Join a church group. Read my blog. Just be sure to take care of yourself first.